When a dream becomes a nightmare — Part I (How it all began)

Disclaimer: Dear reader, as I enjoy music very much I have taken the freedom to add some songs to the story. Feel free to listen to them while reading.

First of all, I don’t believe in cheesy love stories. I don’t think that the life depicted in a Hollywood romance movie could ever become reality.

I am in a long-term relationship and we have mastered several challenging situations. This strengthens the relationship but at the same time, it develops a certain connection which is based on a kind of dependence — or at least that is true for me because it gives you security.

I am thankful having experienced a typical teen-romance like the ones you read in books: lots of butterflies in the stomach, music which connects you with special moments and memories, the first kiss, the first everything. When I think back it has been a really carefree time although when my 17-year old myself would have disagreed with me. I mean when you are in your teens you often see more trouble and problems in things where there are none. And yes, puberty is not always easy but nonetheless, I am grateful for this teen-love I was able to experience.

It was a great time, of course with a lot of ups and downs — just the typical teenage life.

Most relationships don’t survive “the big personality change” as I like to call it. Around your twenties, your priorities shift. You may grow apart because you pursue different dreams. It is not that unusual that you as a person change. This was exactly the case with us — we both changed and although we went through this “transition” we didn’t grow apart.

But I realised that I became during my university years way more outgoing and extroverted. In short, I became more myself again. I was always a happy and very vivid as a child and I somehow lost this part over time. University was a great time. Of course, the exam season was always a dreadful and very stressful time, nonetheless, I enjoyed my life as a student with every facet that belonged to such a student life. Yes, lots of parties, drinking and so on…

This all led to the notion that I might be missing somethings out because I am in a relationship; because I am tied to a person. When you fully trust your partner and you share an open communication then why not try opening the relationship, we both thought as we discussed my “fear of missing out”.

Fast forward: It worked astonishingly well. Experiencing all the things that normally a single person does was, to be frank, fun. Physical cheating was no longer cheating. The only limit we set ourself was emotional cheating. And surprisingly I had no problem whatsoever to keep those two components apart. I never saw myself as a person who would be capable of separating emotions from sex, but it worked well.

I had two totally different things that usually are not compatible — I had a stable relationship with a person who was and is always there for me and whom I love while simultaneously I had almost all the freedom a single person has.

Like already mentioned in the beginning, I am not a believer in cheesy love stories. Of course, every relationship has some magic moments but I never believed in love at first sight or in soulmates…

to be continued…

Originally published on Medium

New Stories…

Hello, long time no see/read.

I actually was surprised that I still knew my password for the WordPress site… 🙂

However, this is just a quick notice that there is a new story on my Medium account.

Feel free to check it out.

Take care!



Yes… this is blog post number 100. For most people, this amount wouldn’t be worth pointing out. However, for me, it means quite a lot. To begin with, I’ve never thought that I would start blogging. Why should? I have a lot of hobbies which keep me active. Why pick up a new one? It’s now been exactly two years ago since I’ve published the post about the reasons why I write. Continue reading

24 Hours Advice For Exams

There are countless tips and tricks for a good exam preparation. And studying for a test doesn’t start just a day before. Especially not, when you have an important exam coming up. Nevertheless, in this blog post, I would love to share my tips you can do a day before the big day. And obviously, studying tips are not part of this post because, to be frank – who’s able to learn an entire textbook 24 hours before the exam? So better start early with learning, but this is another topic.

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Eat Sweat Play: How Sport Can Change Our Lives by Anna Kessel

Anna Kessel’s book has one main purpose – inspiring women to enjoy sports. The book is aimed in first line at women who are not that into sports. Therefore I hesitated, as I could call myself active. Moreover, I exercise quite a lot. I hit three times the gym for strength training and once a week I work on my endurance. It sounds weird, saying this out loud, but I guess I’m sporty. I have no clue why I have sometimes trouble to associate this word with me because I played for many years floorball but I never saw myself as someone who does a lot of sport.

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