In general, I always found blogging somewhat special and fascinating. I saw in movies and TV series several people writing their own blog. And for me it was something that only a very talented writer could do. It had an aspect of unattainability. I remember clearly the MTV series Awkward, where the main character, Jenna Hamilton, had her own blog. She uses it like a public diary. The series itself had for my taste too much teen drama going on but the thought of blogging stuck in my head for some weeks. The last time I saw this series was long ago and I have almost forgotten the idea of writing and then publishing afterwards, so the entire world could read it. I also never knew anybody else who was a journalist, an author or a blogger. For me, it was a wonderful world which I only was able to see and observe from far away and will never be a part of. About three years ago I could imagine myself setting up a blog-like-page where I would document my time studying abroad. But I would only share it with my family and close friends. And this time studying abroad is not a fix plan, therefore I forgot the idea and it faded very quickly into the background.
I recall that I also never followed a blogger until two years ago. The reason for this is for me personally up to this moment very unclear because I know that I would have enjoyed reading posts written by interesting people. The very first blog I was following posted a lot of healthy and easy recipes. And believe me, when you know me, you would have never guessed that I would sign up for a cooking blog. I like to cook but to be perfectly frank I am not very passionate about it. The second blog I subscribed to is written by a dear friend of mine. This was my first blog I sincerely read and she gave me a huge push to get involved in social networks like Twitter and Instagram. And there it started. I began to enjoy all the involvement and networking. Nonetheless, at that time, I still never thought that I would pick up blogging.
My personal motivation to take up blogging started as I received all the wonderful comments and feedback on Medium for a post I published. Those comments were really touching and motivating as the readers told me that they could relate with my story and that they were inspired by it. I was really sure about blogging and created immediately a site with WordPress. I felt like nothing could stop me. I was highly motivated as ideas for future posts developed really quickly. At that moment I was, and, to be honest, I still am, not sure on what topic I will be mainly focusing with this blog. Therefore, I am explicitly not labelling it. I would love to have the freedom of changing it and cover several and varied topics.
However, at night there were some thoughts which came through my mind that made me feel very insecure. How am I able to maintain a blog? How often should I post? And how on earth would I find the time and moreover the inspiration for all the many posts? Who would even read my blog? What is my theme for this blog? Lifestyle? Do I even need a fixed topic or can a change it? What should the layout look like? Are white, green and black as main colours acceptable? And all of a sudden I felt like I made a mistake. There was just this sinking feeling that I will not be able to keep up with blogging. With the social platform Medium, I have lovely, generous and friendly readers and I am also able to publish it through a publication, The Coffeelicious, which would help me to share my story and spread it all over Twitter. There I was also able to post whenever I felt like writing something. With this blog, I have no readers so far and it would be difficult to build a solid readership up. And I can imagine that it is not easy at all to come up with all the ideas. For a moment, I was just seeing all the possible negative sides which could arise from it. To be honest, I was afraid, scared and even frightened. I felt like I was doing something fundamentally wrong by setting up this blog. The thought of it freaked me out.
But the purpose of this blog is not actually building up a huge readership or being popular. The blog should exist because I love to write and by publishing my feelings and problems I may even help somebody else out there or just serve as an entertainment for my readers. This blog should be in first line something I enjoy doing, comparable to a leisure time activity. Having realised that, I felt like the weight on my shoulders disappeared slowly but steadily.
Although I am very aware of the fact that it is a long way ahead, I am eager to give it a try. It would be great if you like to join my journey! But be aware, I myself have no idea which destination I am heading to and how many detours I will be taking. We will simply see where this blog will take me. Nonetheless, you are very welcome to be a part of my blogging adventure.